We are in the house and I’m starting to feel like a grown up again! It’s like I have my own life back. I have everything that is important, unpacked and put away. Just need to figure out where I’m going to put and organize all that not-so-important stuff. But that’s the fun part of a new house. Willow is slowly getting her stuff together. Last weekend she went to the Cape with my parents to have the inspection done on their new house so she wasn’t around to get it together but we’ll get there. And this weekend I got the yard all mowed, the gardens all weeded and Willow and my dad got our new pool up. There’s nothing like getting a bunch of yard work done and then taking a dip in the pool!
I have been doing a little bit of running in my new neighborhood. There’s a sidewalk on the main road that is about 1/2 mile from my house. I’m amazed at how much more relaxed I am running on the sidewalk. It’s so nice not to spend my whole run worrying about dodging cars. Only problem is that with all the moving and organizing, I didn’t have time or utensils to cooks so we ate a lot of fast food. That caused me some problems on my first couple of runs in the new neighborhood. I was basically the poster child for crap in, crap out. This morning was a bit better. Still did some walking but that’s ok. I tried to talk myself out of the run while lying in my nice bed with my awesome new mattress and the AC keeping the icky humidity out. But eventually, I berated my laziness enough to get my ass up and out the door and that’s the hardest part.
I’m on day 30 something or maybe 40 of no-sugar. I’ve really shocked myself in how well I’m doing with that. I’ve lost 10.4 lbs and the cravings are getting fewer and far between. Our neighbors gave us a couple of Drumsticks (my favorite ice cream treat!) this weekend when it was hot out. Willow ate hers and I put mine in the freezer for her to have another day. It was in there for 3 days and after the first day, I forgot all about it. That’s huge!
I’m starting to feel less guilt about the huge mistake that I made in moving us. I’m coming around to that part when you see why something really bad happens. We are in a better house, we are both happy again, and now I know better than to allow someone else to hold my happiness.
Today is day 15 of avoiding processed sugar.
After doing some reading about food addiction, it was all up in my grill and unavoidable that I have a food addiction and sugar is a major trigger for me. I mean I knew it before, but I didn’t fully understand exactly why and what was going on. I know that it has gotten much worse in the last two years and I attribute that to being unhappy for too long. Now that I’m getting my life back and feel like a 1,000 lb burden has been lifted from my shoulders, I’m working on fixing these bad habits that have evolved while dealing with someone else’s bullshit. And I’ve learned the hard way to not let anyone else ruin my happiness. Other people’s shit doesn’t have to become your shit.
In the interest of full disclosure, because there is sugar in EVERYTHING, to make this as basic as possible (otherwise I wouldn’t stick to it) I’ve been avoiding the obvious sugar laden foods (cookies, candy, cake) and sticking to things that don’t have sugar or artificial sweeteners in the first 5 ingredients. It has been really tough but I’m sick of being addicted to this crap and after 15 days, it’s starting to get easier. I lost 3.8 lbs in the first week and it’s made a difference in my running.
Today I tried my third shot at the final day of the Couch to 5k program. The first time I added more hills to my run so I had to walk three times. The second time was Saturday when even at 7am it was hot and humid. Humidity and me don’t work well together and right about the middle point of my run, my legs just stopped running. No conscious decision by me, they just stopped.
Then, this morning the universe came together to give me a good run. It all just came together. I slept great last night. The temp was about 49 and the humidity was at about 58%. And I was ready! After about the 1/2 mile mark a little voice in my head said “You got this shit.” My first thought was “Uh, am I hearing voices now” and then I was like “Yeah, I do got this shit!” And I killed it. A nice average pace of about an 11 minute mile and I was in the zone. When the voice in my earbuds said “Cool Down” I did a little dance right there in the middle of the road. Luckily, there was no one around me because I was just going to town. I’m not sure if it was that runner’s high that people talk about, but I felt GOOOOOOOOD!
I’m exercising again. Getting rid of my bad eating habits. My kid’s happy. My job rocks and I get to work with amazing people. The house stuff is all coming together. Everything is falling into place and I’m happy again.
It’s funny how you don’t realize just how unhappy you were until you are back to being happy again. Unhappiness does happen but don’t stick around hoping for something to get better. Life’s too short to waste an entire year being miserable.